Knocked Out

Yesterday I had all four of my wisdom teeth extracted. In order for me to do this I had them put me to sleep during because I cry at the sight of a needle. Let me tell you this was a weird experience. It all happened so fast. They took me into the room and within two minutes they had the laughing gas on me. I felt myself slightly slipping. It felt as if my whole body was going numb but to make sure I started to more my toes and fingers and I even talked and I could do all three. I heard the oral surgeon say this is going to feel a little tight and can you make a fist and then I was gone. I felt like i was time traveling. Then I felt like when I was coming back I felt like everything was moving backwards even the medical staff and they were in on it, it seemed. It all felt like 5 seconds but it was about an hour in all. Of course my mom is freaking out over me but I keep telling her I'm fine. I was totally able to come to the party last night but my mother wouldn't let me. Yet another thing to add to my list of excitements for moving out and college. So far having them taken out isn't as bad as I've heard. The main thing that sucks is that I want to eat real food. Like Penn Station sounds amazing and pizza does and everything that I would have open my mouth and chew to eat sounds good but that will take a few days!!
I don't know whats in store today but I hope I can have some sort of fun today.

I just realized that I only have one full week left of school then two half weeks full of studying and Exams!!!!

So I realized today that even though I cant wait till I'm officially done with High School, I will miss it. I mean how many times in your life do you get the chance to live like you do in High School. You live with your parents and they support you (well at least most of the time), there are like 1600 kids that you have the opportunity to be friends with or get to know, get to know some teachers and actually get to come to like some of them (they are all there to help you even though at some times it doesn't seem like they are). I'm not explaining it as well as I am in my head but to me thats okay.
Friday I am having all four of my wisdom teeth removed and I'm kind of nervous. I'm getting knocked out because I don't think I could handle being awake for that but I hate the thought of needles and I would have to have an IV and that makes me cringe. I also have this party I want to go to that night and I've heard from some people that they hung out with friends that night and from others that they didn't feel like doing anything. Honestly I'm torn. I want to hang out with my friends because its one of my last chances to hang out with all my friends before I leave for the summer and College next year but I also like the thought of just lying in bed sleeping or watching movies all weekend. I guess I won't be able to make a decision until I get out on Friday.
I still have some work to do tonight so I better stop writing and get to it....but honestly I'll probably post this then open my Calc book and close it right back up and save it for last minute like I've been doing lately.
One last thing that I'm hoping to do for the rest of this school year is make the best of it. I only have 3 more weeks to do what most kids do in High School and I don't want to say later in life that I didn't make the most of my high school experience when I had the chance. I should live it up and enjoy myself instead of wallow in self pity :)

LIVE

YESTURDAY is a memory....a memory is something meant to look back on and remember but it's the past so don't live you life based on it.....TOMORROW is a future memory which is something to look forward to but yet again not something to live you life based on...TODAY is the memory you are currently creating and the only thing you have control over and as far as you know the last day you'll have so live your life like it is the Last Today you'll ever have and make the best of all the opportunities you receive!!!!

I was hanging out with a bunch of my friends tonight and they kept talking about how excited they are for college but I kept thinking about how much more I am to Graduate High School than go to college. I mean yes i am excited to go to college and finally have some Independence but its a scary thought to me. Its the next step to being the adult and I truly don't know if I'm ready for that. Life scares me a bit and I know that's a bad thing but if the thought about your future and its uncertainty doesn't scare you even a bit, you're lying to yourself.
Tomorrow I have to give Calculus presentation on a subject I barely know so I hope that goes well but we'll see. We were all talking tonight about if we got paid to go back to school would we do it. Most of us wouldn't even for 10,000 a month they wouldn't do it. Honestly I don't know if I could do it all over again. I'm realizing that I spent the last four years going to school (going from class to class), then coming home to watch tv, do homework then go to bed. Most people add a life in their school week too but at least this year I've done nothing after school. I used to have something every night to do but I cleared my schedule this year so I can do more things with my friends but I haven't really done much.
I feel like I got jipped for my senior year. It defiantly has not been my favorite year of my life so far.
The days are counting done. Only 18 more school days till I have no more in High School. I super excited because Senioritus has been really bad and its been affecting my motivation for not only school but everything. Take this weekend for instance. I had a to do list to get done on Saturday so I can do whatever I want on Sunday but I ended up getting like nothing gone on Saturday, not because of me but mostly my sister, but I had to do it all today and then still hang out which I truly needed.
We all went over Dorothy and Jackies and hung out. We played bunco, went to Tazinos, played bingo, fell on the floor a couple of times, tried the tree swing, had a bon fire, and had some deep conversations. I finally got the chance to explain why being a twin isn't always as fun as it sounds and I think most of my friends understood for once. We ended up staying like an hour and a half later than I said we should but I felt like I needed the break and it was worth it.
Well I skipped a Student council meeting that had Mr. Marty coming to stay over at my girls night out and my mother found out and we were arguing about it. I said that I knew that I skipped it but that I needed to and that I would talk to Ms. Novak about it tomorrow to find out what I missed but she still got all mad. It was a choice and I made it so I don't know what she has to do with it.
Writing this I just realized that when i took a shower tonight I shaved one leg but skipped the other. Oh well I guess it will be sweats tomorrow.
I should probably get some sleep but it felt good to get this out. I'll keep updating hopefully sooner and more often than I've been.

School Reflection

As the days count down till Graduation and I'm reflecting on my High School experience I don't know if I like it. While I'm watching a movie or t.v show and they start showing all these things that the High Schoolers do and I'm realizing that I have had a really boring High School experience. I never stretched the limits even a little bit. I even realized that I do absolutely nothing on weekdays when a ton of other people actually hang out like it was a weekend which makes sense if you think about it because a lot of people don't hang out on weekends until the time we get out of school anyways. Don't get me wrong, I've had a ton of fun and experiences but none of them are the normal basic high school ones. I guess I have matured to early and I think about things to much. What would happen if I do this, or how does this affect others involved, if my mom found out what would she say? I guess what I'm saying is I wish I would have went outside my comfort zone a little and minorly rebelled just for the experience. I have morals and I definitely stick to them. I don't want this to sound like I regret everything from high school but I do wish I would have had somewhat more of a life.
Okay besides that little tidbit of self reflection I had a pretty good day. Jenny had an AVON party and I got to hang out with some good friends.
I have more to say but I'm tired so I will continue more later :)

So I realized today that I am truly a hopeless Romantic!! In order though for me to get a chance at that kind of love I'm going to need to be pushed more outside my comfort zone, so when the time/chance comes I won't miss it because I was to afraid. But hey, whats life without a little fear or challenge....BORING thats right BORING

realizing that the best place to go to feel better about yourself is the Bathroom,Think about it! Don't you sing your best when you in the Shower & don't you look 10 times better in the mirror than in half of the photos your tagged in,YES!! Its the one place you can go where there are no witnesses and ...you can be yourself (I mean who is going to interrupt a person thats been in there awhile, right?)

Dear Camera why can't you see what I see when I'm looking in the mirror :)

Starting Out!!

Wow...so first blog here, what to say, what to say!!! I have so many thoughts that run through my head all the time that I decided that I should have a blog or somewhere to just let out what I'm feeling so I don't EXPLODE!! Sometimes I feel that I'm clever and sometimes I htink my friends/family are funny, so this will be a mix of whatever goes on in my day and the thoughts that enter this mind.

A couple things about me:

well I don't really now how to describe myself so I'll use words that my friends use

Funny

Nice

Honest

Strong presonality

Smart

Compasonite

I am also a Christian and God is my first love! I am still growing in my relationship with him and I do stomble at some points but he will always guide me.

Don't worry I am a well round person :)